II。
THE MAN…MADE FAMILY。
The family is older than humanity； and therefore cannot be called a
human institution。 A post office； now； is wholly human； no other
creature has a post office； but there are families in plenty among birds
and beasts； all kinds permanent and transient； monogamous； polygamous
and polyandrous。
We are now to consider the growth of the family in humanity； what is its
rational development in humanness； in mechanical； mental and social
lines； in the extension of love and service； and the effect upon it of
this strange new arrangementa masculine proprietor。
Like all natural institutions the family has a purpose； and is to be
measured primarily as it serves that purpose； which is； the care and
nurture of the young。 To protect the helpless little ones； to feed and
shelter them； to ensure them the benefits of an ever longer period of
immaturity； and so to improve the racethis is the original purpose of
the family。
When a natural institution becomes human it enters the plane of
consciousness。 We think about it； and； in our strange new power of
voluntary action do things to it。 We have done strange things to the
family； or； more specifically； men have。
Balsac； at his bitterest； observed； 〃Women's virtue is man's best
invention。〃 Balsac was wrong。 Virtuethe unswerving devotion to one
mateis common among birds and some of the higher mammals。 If Balsac
meant celibacy when he said virtue； why that is one of man's
inventionsthough hardly his best。
What man has done to the family； speaking broadly； is to change it from
an institution for the best service of the child to one modified to his
own service； the vehicle of his comfort； power and pride。
Among the heavy millions of the stirred East； a childnecessarily a
male childis desired for the credit and glory of the father； and his
fathers； in place of seeing that all a parent is for is the best service
of the child。 Ancestor worship； that gross reversal of all natural law；
is of wholly androcentric origin。 It is strongest among old patriarchal
races； lingers on in feudal Europe； is to be traced even in America
today in a few sporadic efforts to magnify the deeds of our ancestors。
The best thing any of us can do for our ancestors is to be better than
they were； and we ought to give our minds to it。 When we use our past
merely as a guide…book； and concentrate our noble emotions on the
present and future； we shall improve more rapidly。
The peculiar changes brought about in family life by the predominance of
the male are easily traced。 In these studies we must keep clearly in
mind the basic masculine characteristics： desire； combat；
self…expressionall legitimate and right in proper use； only
mischievous when excessive or out of place。 Through them the male is
led to strenuous competition for the favor of the female； in the
overflowing ardours of song； as in nightingale and tomcat； in wasteful
splendor of personal decoration； from the pheasant's breast to an
embroidered waistcoat； and in direct struggle for the prize； from the
stag's locked horns to the clashing spears of the tournament。
It is earnestly hoped that no reader will take offence at the
necessarily frequent； reference to these essential features of maleness。
In the many books about women it is； naturally； their femaleness that
has been studied and enlarged upon。 And though women； after thousands
of years of such discussion； have become a little restive under the
constant use of the word female： men； as rational beings； should not
object to an analogous studyat least not for some timea few
centuries or so。
How； then； do we find these masculine tendencies； desire； combat and
self…expression； affect the home and family when given too much power？
First comes the effect in the preliminary work of selection。 One of the
most uplifting forces of nature is that of sex selection。 The males；
numerous； varied； pouring a flood of energy into wide modifications；
compete for the female； and she selects the victor； this securing to the
race the new improvements。
In forming the proprietary family there is no such competition； no such
selection。 The man； by violence or by purchase； does the choosinghe
selects the kind of woman that pleases him。 Nature did not intend him
to select； he is not good at it。 Neither was the female intended to
competeshe is not good at it。
If there is a race between males for a matethe swiftest gets her
first； but if one male is chasing a number of females he gets the
slowest first。 The one method improves our speed： the other does not。
If males struggle and fight with one another for a mate； the strongest
secures her； if the male struggles and fights with the female（a
peculiar and unnatural horror； known only among human beings） he most
readily secures the weakest。 The one method improves our strengththe
other does not。
When women became the property of men； sold and bartered； 〃given away〃
by their paternal owner to their marital owner； they lost this
prerogative of the female； this primal duty of selection。 The males
were no longer improved by their natural competition for the female； and
the females were not improved； because the male did not select for
points of racial superiority； but for such qualities as pleased him。
There is a locality in northern Africa； where young girls are
deliberately fed with a certain oily seed； to make them fat；that they
may be the more readily married；as the men like fat wives。 Among
certain more savage African tribes the chief's wives are prepared for
him by being kept in small dark huts and fed on 〃mealies' and molasses；
precisely as a Strasbourg goose is fattened for the gourmand。 Now
fatness is not a desirable race characteristic； it does not add to the
woman's happiness or efficiency； or to the child's； it is merely an
accessory pleasant to the master； his attitude being much as the amorous
monad ecstatically puts it； in Sill's quaint poem； 〃Five Lives；〃
〃O the little female monad's lips！
O the little female monad's eyes！
O the little； little； female； female monad！〃
This ultra littleness and ultra femaleness has been demanded and
produced by our Androcentric Culture。
Following this； and part of it； comes the effect on motherhood。 This
function was the original and legitimate base of family life； and its
ample sustaining power throughout the long early period of 〃the
mother…right；〃 or as we call it； the matriarchate； the father being her
assistant in the great work。 The patriarchate； with its proprietary
family； changed this altogether； the woman； as the property of the man
was considered first and foremost as a means of pleasure to him； and
while she was still valued as a mother； it was in a tributary capacity。
Her children were now his； his property； as she was； the whole enginery
of the family was turned from its true use to this new one； hitherto
unknown； the service of the adult male。
To this day we are living under the influence of the proprietary family。
The duty of the wife is held to involve man…service as well as
child…service； and indeed far more； as the duty of the wife to the
husband quite transcends the duty of the mother to the child。
See for instance the English wife staying with her husband in India and
sending the children home to be brought up； because India is bad for
children。 See our common law that the man decides the place of
residence； if the wife refuses to go with him to howsoever unfit a place
for her and for the little ones； such refusal on her part constitutes
〃desertion〃 and is ground for divorce。
See again the idea that the wife must remain with the husband though a
drunkard； or diseased； regardless of the sin against the child involved
in such a relation。 Public feeling on these matters is indeed changing；
but as a whole the ideals of the man…made family still obtain。
The effect of this on the woman has been inevitably to weaken and
overshadow her sense of the real purpose of the family； of the
relentless responsibilities of her duty as a mother。 She is first
taught duty to her parents； with heavy religious sanction； and then duty
to her husband； similarly buttressed； but her duty to her children has
been left to instinct。 She is not taught in girlhood as to her
preeminent power and duty as a mother； her young ideals are all of
devotion to the lover and husband： with only the vaguest sense of
results。
The young girl is reared in what we call 〃innocence；〃 poetically
described as 〃bloom；〃 and this condition is held one of her chief
〃charms。〃 The requisite is wholly androcentric。 This 〃innocence〃 does
not enable her to choose a husband wisely； she does not even know the
dangers that possibly confront her。 We vaguely imagine that her father
or brother； who do know； will protect her。 Unfortunately the father and
brother； under our current 〃double standard〃 of morality do not judge
the applicants as she would if she knew the nature of their offenses。
Furthermore； if her heart is set on one of them； no amount of general
advice and opposition serves to prevent her marrying him。 〃I love him！〃
she says； sublimely。 〃I do no